We’re officially 3 months away from Haines! I’m feeling really solid in my fitness and have been surprised and delighted that the work seems to feel a bit more effortless. Even in threshold and tempo workouts, these hard sessions are definitely producing more impressive results. There’s quite a bit of confidence in feeling like I could race tomorrow – I don’t think I’d hit my time goal, but at least I could easily maneuver through the distance.
This week I was supposed to race a 15K in Daytona – it’s kind of a fun birthday tradition since I first podiumed there (and on my actual birthday!) at my inaugural time on that course. The plan ended up unraveling last minute as our entire squad had to defer for one reason or another – I was super relieved as I haven’t really gotten much speedwork in lately. I emailed the race director to request a deferral and when she responded (almost immediately), I found out that I had….never actually registered.
On brand.
What went well?
-I fell in love with running again. It’s really important to remember how much of this discipline comes in seasons. We get greedy sometimes, salivating over how things were (I was just bragging about my 5K time from two years ago today, actually) or how we wish we could stay in peak running fitness forever, but it’s just not sustainable. I had not felt that pure joy from running in some time. I’ve still been going through the motions, keeping a bit of base and enjoying community runs, but the spark just wasn’t there. I had a bit of a breakthrough on Tuesday – my friend Janel was picking up 20 years downtown and I had an hour on the schedule. I ran immediately after the meeting, it was late (9ish?) and I had a shit attitude going into it. But once I started, the breeze felt like ~*magic*~ and the light drizzle was such a welcome accompaniment. My negative splits looked intentional (they were not) and I finally broke into the 8s for the first time in a very long time. I cried at the end of that run because it felt like a reunion with a long distance friend.
Alas, I’m sure I will hate running soon, love it again in a few weeks, and repeat the cycle ad nauseum. It’s just another reminder of the impermanence of it all. Like Nike had written on a billboard on the Chicago (was it NYC?) Marathon course, “if you don’t hate running a little, you don’t love running enough”
-Y’all. The cycling is going so good. We did a bakery ride over to this cute little Bavarian gem in Yalaha. I kept wanting to call it Valhalla or Yahala, but it is not either of those. We had a gnarly headwind on the return (I lose my will to live kind of often in this training and it happened for me this week on the bridge circa mile 35) and almost 2K of elevation but still finished with an 18.7 mph overall over the almost 63 miles. Three months ago I would’ve laughed at you if you said I could hold that. It’s really getting me confident for that sub 6 goal in December and I’m excited to start stacking bricks this week!
-I really surprised myself with swimming. Brittney and Alex shared some of their swimming workouts with me and I picked one of Brittney’s for a long swim workout on Monday. It felt really good and I think the trick is to just keep doing these intervals instead of long unintentional swims that bore me. My pace was great and it still feels awkward and awful to start, but I see an improvement (mostly mentally).
-Not related to fitness, but I felt a lot of love over the past week. It was my birthday and usually around this time I get some cringy memories to some of the ones I spent in active addiction in absolute misery. I really have the best people in the world and felt loved and celebrated all week. Forever grateful for these humans, many of which I never would’ve met without immersing myself in the endurance community.
Was I resentful, fearful, or overly self-critical during training?
-I’m happy to say that for the first time since I’ve started doing these training logs I can say no. In early recovery, I was told that self-esteem comes from doing esteemable things and the easiest way to build that is by doing the things you say you’re going to do. This isn’t a novel concept, but that specific verbiage is always very impactful to me when deciding whether I’m going to stick to the plan or skip a workout. I was pretty much spot on with my schedule which was one of the big goals this week – getting intentional.
Where did I find joy?
-I spotted a mini pig on our ride Saturday. He was sitting with a chicken at a boiled peanut stand in the middle of nowhere and I spent the next 20 minutes or so on the bike daydreaming about their adventures
-THE WEATHER!!! On my birthday run this week, we all excitedly guffawed at a stoplight at the breeze. Such a treat after swamp soup season
-In my people
-Sticking to all of my goals for the week, except for 2 lifts. If that is the only place I can nitpick this week, I’ll happily take it.
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